When My Child was on Fire…

I lost sight of the goal. The problem became bipolar or willfulness. I no longer could see that he was a teen going through typical teen development, and I began to lose my connection with him. I no longer sought to understand; I just tried to fix everything. I moved away from empathizing, and I began to feel pity which made it difficult for me to remain consistent to be able to understand and provide a listening ear while also providing structure and safety. I think this is my biggest regret. I was doing everything in survival mode. We were in constant crisis, and I could not fix it alone. Yet I am yelling that my child is on fire and it falls on deaf ears. We so badly needed water to put out the flames; but instead, it seemed that there was an enormous bellow blowing our way. We are all scrambling but unable to diminish the flames.

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